Big Brother alum Robyn Stone is speaking out about her experience watching the finale of the popular TV series.
The reality star, who was crowned season 18’s winner in October, says she cried a lot after the finale, and it was hard for her to watch a final two episodes with her family.
“I went through a very dark period,” she told PEOPLE.
“I didn’t want to watch it again and I wasn’t happy about it.
And I was very hurt.
I cried a couple of times.””
It was tough because I was just really proud of the house.
And so it was like I wasn’ doing anything special.
It was just like, ‘Well, it was nice watching it, but what were we doing?'”
Stone says she went through what she calls “a dark period” after the final episode aired.
The 32-year-old was one of the showrunners of Big Brother from 2006 to 2010, and her fellow housemates took a lot of heat for the way the house was run.
“The first week it was kind of a shock,” she said.
“And then it was, ‘Oh, that was good, that didn’t happen.’
And then it got better, and then it became a big thing, and the house didn’t really have a bad reputation.”
Stone said she was still trying to figure out why she was chosen to be one of Big House’s most famous members.
“It was so cool,” she says.
“But the way they picked the house members for it was really odd.
I mean, I’ve never heard of them before.”
She says she and her family didn’t feel like they were chosen because they were housemates, but because they are the most popular house members on the show.
“They didn’t think we were house members, but I think they were like, oh, maybe we should give us a shot,” she explained.
Stone said that the final season of Big B was a “big time” for her.
“When I started to work on it, I got to the point where I wasn.
I was like, OK, now I’m ready to go,” she continued.
“You’re like, Oh, my God.
Now I can actually see myself in the next person, so that was the big moment.”
The 33-year old said that she would like to have a say in who wins the next season, but admits that it’s not something she’s willing to take any risks on.
“We just want to make it work,” she added.